Two more days......

Two more days until back to the doctor. Nervous...anxious....excited....scared.   Been thinking alot this past weekend about the possible risk of abnormalities since I'm over 35.... Chance of Down's Syndrome and other chromosomal deficits are way higher after 35.  Also....ugh...do we really want to pass epilepsy down to the baby.  Although all doctors/scientists are not in 100% agreement that epilepsy is hereditary...it's still a chance we take.  This has bothered Art for a long time...he's always beating himself up...asking why he has to have it.... asking why he has it but his brother doesn't...since they are twins.  I have no explanation. The doctors that I have asked...and even my biology teacher...seems to feel that either both Art and his brother have it and it just hasn't showed itself to Art's brother....or that the guys aren't monozygotic twins (one egg)...and that they are dizygotic twins (two separate eggs) aka fraternal.   Contrary to popular belief....fraternal twins can look identical...there have been many documented cases of such.   Only way to know for sure is some type of special blood test. Regardless.... it's been weighing on my mind,. Making me wonder what if our own selfish desire to have a baby results in bringing into the world a baby that will be sick...or that won't be able to live a happy, normal life. =[